How to Get Teenagers to Take Ownership of Their Lives

Navigating the teenage years can be challenging, both for teenagers and their parents. One of the most common struggles is encouraging teens to take accountability, responsibility, and ownership of their actions and decisions. Brent Williams, Founder and Head Presenter at Empower U, sheds light on how teenagers can transform their mindset to take full ownership of their lives.

The Concept of Life as a Ladder

Brent introduces a compelling metaphor – life as a ladder. From birth until the end, we’re either climbing up or sliding down this ladder, based on our actions and decisions. The direction we move is significantly influenced by whether we operate above or below a metaphorical line.

Check out Episode 2 of The Empower U Podcast where we delve deeper into the concept of living above and below the line.

Playing Above the Line

To ascend the ladder, teens must play above the line, embodying three critical behaviors:

  1. Accountability: Accepting the consequences of their actions without shifting blame.
  2. Responsibility: Proactively managing their life and its outcomes.
  3. Ownership: Embracing their life’s entirety, including successes and failures.

Playing Below the Line

Conversely, descending the ladder is often the result of playing below the line, characterised by:

  1. Blame: Pointing fingers at others for one’s circumstances.
  2. Excuses: Justifying inaction or failure.
  3. Denial: Refusing to accept the reality of their situation.

The Outcome Matters

Brent emphasises that the distinction between right and wrong is less important than the outcome of one’s actions. The crucial question teens should ask themselves is whether their behavior serves their growth and well-being. This simple yet profound perspective shift can help teens evaluate their decisions and actions more effectively, encouraging them to act in ways that are beneficial to their development.

Taking Ownership

Taking ownership means more than just admitting when you’re wrong; it’s about actively shaping your life through conscious decisions. Teens are encouraged to reflect on whether their actions, ethics, and the people in their lives contribute positively to their growth.

Empowering teenagers to take ownership of their lives is a transformative process. By understanding the importance of playing above the line, teens can learn to make choices that propel them up the ladder of life. It’s not just about avoiding negative behaviours but actively choosing paths that lead to personal growth and success.

Personal Development and Life Skills for Teenagers

Ready to dive deeper into personal development and take control of your life? Download our free Empower U program guide to learn more about our seminars designed specifically for teenagers and young adults. Discover how Empower U can help you or your teenager navigate the complexities of adolescence with confidence and ownership. Download the guide now and start your journey towards empowerment.

The 6 Human Needs: The Key to Unlocking Your Potential

Ever wondered why we do the things we do? Why some things make us super happy and others, not so much? Well, Brent Williams, the founder of Empower U, recently broke down a fascinating concept that might just have the answers – the 6 human needs. This idea isn’t just a bunch of boring psychology; it’s like the cheat code to understanding yourself and steering your life towards success.

The 6 Human Needs Simplified

  1. Feeling Safe and Comfy (Certainty/Comfort): We all love to feel safe and have things go as planned, right? It’s about knowing what to expect so we can chill and not worry about what’s coming next.
  2. Spicing Things Up (Uncertainty/Variety): Life would be so boring if everything was predictable. We need surprises, fun, and a bit of adventure to keep things interesting.
  3. Feeling Important (Significance): Everyone wants to feel like they matter, whether it’s being the top scorer on your team or getting that nod of approval from someone you look up to.
  4. Connecting with Others (Love and Connection): From hanging out with friends to feeling close with your family, having strong connections makes everything better.
  5. Growing as a Person (Growth): Whether it’s learning a new skill, overcoming a challenge, or just becoming a better version of yourself, growth is key.
  6. Helping Out (Contribution): There’s something special about helping others and making a difference, even in small ways. It makes us feel part of something bigger.

Why It Matters

Understanding these needs can help you figure out what drives you and how to be happier and more fulfilled. For example, if you’re feeling bored or stuck, maybe you need more Variety or Growth in your life. Or, if you’re feeling lonely, focusing on Love and Connection could be a game-changer.

Dive Deeper with Empower U

Fascinated by the 6 human needs and keen to discover more about yourself? Empower U’s seminars are the perfect place to delve deeper into personal development and set yourself (or your teen) up for success. Our engaging, interactive sessions provide the tools and insights you need to navigate life’s challenges and unlock your full potential. Join us at Empower U and start your journey towards a more fulfilling life today.

Understanding these needs is like having a map for life. By knowing what you’re really after, you can make choices that lead to happiness and success. So, why not explore further with Empower U and truly unlock your potential? Keen to know more? Download our free program guide!

 

Top 3 Ways To Help Teenagers Manage Their Emotions

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Top 3 Ways To Help Teenagers Manage Their Emotions - Empower UEmpower U

For every single one of us, learning to manage our emotions is vital to almost everything we do, whether it’s school, work, relationships, sports, or anything else we choose to devote our time to.

So how do we learn to manage and deal with our emotions and thoughts? The answer is really quite simple… and it comes in 3 steps:

  1. Physiology
  2. Language, and
  3. Focus.

Let’s look at each of these in a little more detail.

Physiology

Whenever we’re feeling stressed, upset, anxious, worried, or other negative emotions, one of the simplest ways to combat those thoughts and feelings is to change your physiology. Physiology is essentially our body language.

This can be something as simple as just standing up and going for a walk, listening to some music, doing some stretches, or anything else that can change your physical state in order to provide a pattern break from your mental state. While this is usually only a temporary solution for the problem, when we get too caught up in a negative spiral, just doing something physical can ‘snap’ your mind out of that thought process.

Language

Many of us don’t realise the powerful effect that our language can have on the way we think and feel. If we’re constantly using negative language, or putting ourselves or others down, then that is going to negatively affect our emotions. Even when we think we’re joking, our subconscious has no sense of humour, and takes everything we say literally. So when you speak negatively, you’re just feeding negative emotions.

For example, if you say “I have a million things on my mind”, you probably only have a handful of things, but your subconscious takes that literally, which causes stress, worry, and overthinking. To prevent this, teenagers need to take an active role in correcting the way they speak to themselves and one another, in order to drive positive thoughts and emotions.

Focus

This is the strongest way for teenagers to grow their ability to manage their emotions. When we’re in a negative state, or highly emotional about something, it’s generally because that’s all we’re focusing on. While there are times where complete focus on something is good, the ability to shift focus from something negative to positive is imperative in order for teenagers to be able to stop a negative spiral of thoughts and emotions and bounce back quickly through focusing on the positives, and being able to find silver linings.

Helping your teenager to learn to manage their emotions is an important skill to give them as they become their own individual, and unfortunately is not one that is really covered in schools. So for parents, finding alternative forms of education, such as Empower U, to support your teenagers growth is the best way to give them a positive mindset to help them achieve success.

For more information about The Empower U Program, click HERE or contact the team on 1300 039 662.

What Happens When We Face Fear?

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What Happens When We Face Fear - Empower U Educational Workshops for TeenagersEmpower U

“To do or not to do?” Our minds tell us no, that we might mess up, that we might disappoint, and that it is just too risky – we are fearful. The prospect of failure in the face of uncertainty gives us a reason to hold back, and so we let our fears consume us, as we decide it’s best to stay within our comfort zones.

However, when we choose not to face our fears, what we may fail to realise is that we are actually validating them — giving them the power to grow, to have a stronger hold on us, and to keep us from living our best lives. Our fears are made up of past experiences that have created the references to the limiting beliefs we have now, and when we allow them to, they are powerful enough to keep us from grabbing the opportunities in front of us. Fortunately, a life lived without fear is something that is completely possible for all of us, and achieving this involves recognising what we may find beyond our comfort zones.

Generally speaking, most people associate the idea of stepping out of their comfort zone with a negative feeling, but it is also universally recognised that when we push through it, it ultimately leads to feelings of pride, satisfaction, and an overall sense of happiness. When we allow ourselves to feel our fears and face them head-on, we are able to have a positive, enriching experience that we can grow from. While we are uncertain of its end result, we know that at the end of the day, victorious or not, choosing to take that risk rewards us with an invaluable learning experience to carry for a lifetime.

Most of our fears aren’t based on facts, but on our personal beliefs.

Here is a short clip from a recent Empower U Program where we have a conversation around beliefs, how they are formed and what we can do to create a new set of beliefs that serves us better.

For more information about The Empower U Program and upcoming events, click HERE or give us a call on 1300 039 662.

 

The Only Failure in Life

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The Only Failure in Life - Empower U Teen EducationEmpower U

Undoubtedly, failing is not a very pleasurable experience. More often than not, it leaves us feeling uncomfortable and discouraged, and is oftentimes the force that holds us back when presented with an opportunity that entails trying something new and unfamiliar. Consequently, it stands in the way of our growth and success. 

So how do we keep this from happening? How do we not let the fear of failure keep us from going for the very things that may help us grow?

We must learn to understand the importance of shifting our beliefs about failure. 

In reality, it is the most successful people who have failed countless times, and they are able to do so because they do not see it as something to avoid, but rather an avenue to maximise their growth. Michael Jordan, considered one of the greatest basketball players of all time, once said,

“I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost more than 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeeded.” – Michael Jordan

As someone who is often in the spotlight, well aware of the importance of each shot he takes, the thought of failing to deliver and disappointing his team and a multitude of fans must be overwhelming – but he recognised how his very failures served as the stepping stones to his extremely successful basketball career. 

Truly, it is when we do not give up that we develop resiliency, as it is when we fail that we are able to truly learn. In Michael Jordan’s case, the shots he missed allowed him to come up with better techniques and strategies so as to improve. And we can learn from this that it is through taking our failures, utilising them to learn — gaining a wider perspective, actively asking questions, and continuously making an effort to improve that we are able to maximise the growth opportunities from our setbacks. 

Here’s a short clip from my recent Empower U Program where I talk about failure and how if we really look at it, there really is only one failure in life.

For more information about The Empower U Program download our latest Program Guide or give us a call on 1300 039 662.

The 4 Levels of Learning

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The 4 Stages of Learning - Empower U Teenage Education Programs AustraliaEmpower U

Before we learn something new, we often do not realise how much we do not know and are yet to learn. At times, when we begin to learn, we discover the gravity of what we do not know and get overwhelmed by its difficulty, which may leave us feeling disheartened. Through understanding the levels of learning, we will be able to more easily recognise how we feel as we keep track of where we are in the learning process. The 4 Levels of Learning are often illustrated as a model that highlights two factors that affect our thinking: Our awareness (consciousness) and our skill level (competence).

1. Unconscious Incompetence

In this stage, we do not have the knowledge or skill set yet, and we do not know that we need to learn it. This is when we do not know what we do not know. For example, as a child who has not been introduced to riding a bike, we are completely unaware of its benefits and usefulness. When a certain idea is introduced to us and we realise that there is value that may be gained from learning it, we then move on to the next level.

2. Conscious Incompetence

When we are in this stage, we are aware of the skill we lack and understand that we must put in the work to bridge the deficit. We can say “I know that I do not know (what this is really about/how to do this)” and hopefully, that will be followed by, “but I would like to learn.” Applying this to the previous example, this is when we begin to learn the fundamentals of properly riding a bicycle and putting it into practice by getting on a bike and working to master its manoeuvring.

3. Conscious Competence

This stage entails being aware of one’s ability to execute, but having to remain conscious as they do so because it doesn’t come naturally yet. This is when we can say “I know I am doing this right” – we know we aren’t incompetent, and that we can ride a bike, but we still need to consciously think about it in order to correctly execute the action.

4. Unconscious Competence

Reaching this stage entails knowing that we know something so well that we don’t even realise that we are doing it when we do. This is when you can ride a bike without even thinking about it, or to take the example even further, when you’re driving a car and you get to your destination without properly remembering how you got there. The skill is so embedded in us that we do not have to continuously process what we are doing.

Embracing the Journey of Learning

The 4 levels of learning framework is best used to help us understand the emotions we experience during the learning process. It helps to reassure ourselves that while learning can get frustrating and challenging, we are well on our way to improving as we continue to do so.

For more information on the 4 levels of learning and The Empower U Program, download our latest program guide or call 1300 039 662.

The Importance of Setting SMART goals

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The Importance of Setting SMART Goals - Empower UEmpower U

At Empower U, we teach participants the process and benefits of setting SMART goals. Setting goals is a recipe for fulfilling many ambitions you want to undertake in your lifetime. 

S.M.A.R.T Goals – How do you do it?

SMART goals is an acronym, providing you with a well established template to set your dreams as realistic objectives. SMART goals should be:

  • (S)pecific – You need to be specific with what you desire so you can become as connected as possible with the outcome. This should establish exactly what you want we want to achieve this goal. 
  • (M)easurable – How can you break down the goal so you can easily measure your progress towards success?
  • (A)attainable – What action steps do you need to take to make this goal a reality?
  • (R)ealistic – Make sure the goal is realistically achievable based on where you are now and the time frame you have given yourself. 
  • (T)ime Orientated – what is a realistic timeframe within which you would like to achieve your ambition? This means you have a deadline to work towards, which creates urgency which drives action. 

Here are some reasons on why it’s so important to learn how to set SMART goals for optimum success. 

S.M.A.R.T Goals Clarify your End Vision

When you set SMART goals, it’s an acceptance that this goal is important to you and you are going to achieve it. You’ve envisioned where you would like to end up. It’s time to start taking action and persist until you succeed. The process of creating the SMART goal makes you think about your ambition in more depth. The more thought into the goal setting process you have, the higher the chances of you seeing the goal through. 

S.M.A.R.T Goals Increase Focus

To focus means to remove your attention from what is unnecessary and instead divert this energy into what is needed. Having goals helps us find what is true to us and what we actually want to achieve in our lifetime. The process of setting SMART goals breaks down how we will get there and what it’s going to take. Having goals improves our long term focus too, as when we create a plan of action, it’s easier to break down the short term steps to reach our objective. 

S.M.A.R.T Goals Dramatically Increases Perseverance 

Having a mapped path for success is a great way to see how far you have come and how much longer you have to go. Having this awareness increases motivation to persevere, as if you know how far away you are from reaching your goal, you’re more likely to keep pushing. If you knew success was right around the corner, would that motivate you? So give yourself that opportunity to successfully achieve your goals.

S.M.A.R.T Goals Introduce Self Discipline

Self discipline is the ability to control your feelings and overcome your weaknesses. The development of genuine self discipline is a journey you will undertake throughout your lifetime, but the best time to focus on developing your self discipline is now. When you set your SMART goals, you have the opportunity to identify your strengths and weaknesses. For example, if your goal is to increase your results at the gym; your strength may be that it’s easy for you to wake up early in the morning to go to the gym. But, your weakness may be that you find it hard to eat lots of fruit and veggies. Keep this in mind when creating your plan of action and be wary of what are your weaknesses are so you can develop your self discipline. 

S.M.A.R.T Goals =  Less Stress, More Success

There’s nothing worse than the feeling of thinking you could have done more. If you have times where you’re blindly chasing an ambition without a plan – it’s no wonder your goals remain unachieved. When you set a SMART goal, you are setting them for no one but yourself. It’s easier to work smarter instead of harder when you have a strategy. This makes your life a whole lot more successful, with a lot less stress. When you want to pursue a goal, setting SMART goals will provide you with the best chance for optimum success. 

Here’s a short clip of Brent about setting SMART goals from a recent Empower U program:

Interested to know more about Empower U? Download our FREE Program Guide to get started today.

Goal Setting: What Do You Want & Why Do Your Want It?

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Goal Setting: What you need to know to get ahead in life - Empower UEmpower U

Life is like a game of soccer; you’re going to get bored very quickly if you don’t have any goals. Goals are simply outcomes that you plan to achieve. Most people never set definite goals for themselves, usually because they want to avoid the disappointment they might feel if they didn’t achieve them. The irony in this situation is, of course, that without goal setting, you are much less likely to achieve them.

A study was conducted amongst graduates of Harvard University. At the 5-year reunion each graduate was asked if they had goals. Many had an idea of what goals were and some even had approximate goals in their head. 3% of the graduates however had clearly defined, written goals.

20 years later (at the 25 year reunion), the graduates were again surveyed. The 3% who had clearly defined written goals were worth more in financial terms than the other 97% combined.

What Do You Want And Why Do You Want It?

Think about the goals you are going to set. Now imagine your six months down the track, after setting these goals.

  • How are you going with them?
  • Have you been doing something everyday that brings you closer to your goal?
  • Has it been easier or harder than you thought it would be?

The biggest challenge people face when setting goals is following through – Once you develop the habit of regularly monitoring your progress towards your goals, achieving them becomes a very manageable task. Achieving a major goal is like eating a huge meal. You have to do it a small bite at a time.

A major reason people don’t achieve their goals is that they don’t really want to. Some people become convinced that they want to own a fast sports car or earn a million dollars, when all they really want is to have people like and admire them. They think that having the car and money will make this happen. This type of goal usually feeds one or more of the six human needs.

A person who sets a goal like this will rarely achieve it, they won’t have the personal drive or passion they need because they are not working towards something that they really want. The other major reason many people don’t follow through on their goals is that at some level they believe that it will be too hard. They decide that achieving it would cause too much pain.

Remember everything we do is either out of our need to avoid pain or our desire to gain pleasure, so make sure the long-term pleasure of achieving your goals outweighs any short-term pain.

Some Helpful Questions to Ask When Setting a Goal:

• What do you want?
• What specifically do you want?
• Why do you want that?
• What specifically will it give you?
• How will you know when you have achieved it?
• How will you FEEL when that happens?

Want to learn more about goal setting and the Empower U program? Download the latest Empower U Program Guide!