For every single one of us, learning to manage our emotions is vital to almost everything we do, whether it’s school, work, relationships, sports, or anything else we choose to devote our time to.
So how do we learn to manage and deal with our emotions and thoughts? The answer is really quite simple… and it comes in 3 steps; Physiology, Language, and Focus.
Whenever we’re feeling stressed, upset, anxious, worried, or other negative emotions, one of the simplest ways to combat those thoughts and feelings is to change your physiology. Physiology is essentially our body language.
This can be something as simple as just standing up and going for a walk, listening to some music, doing some stretches, or anything else that can change your physical state in order to provide a pattern break from your mental state. While this is usually only a temporary solution for the problem, when we get too caught up in a negative spiral, just doing something physical can ‘snap’ your mind out of that thought process.
Many of us don’t realise the powerful effect that our language can have on the way we think and feel. If we’re constantly using negative language, or putting ourselves or others down, then that is going to negatively affect our emotions. Even when we think we’re joking, our subconscious has no sense of humour, and takes everything we say literally. So when you speak negatively, you’re just feeding negative emotions.
For example, if you say “I have a million things on my mind”, you probably only have a handful of things, but your subconscious takes that literally, which causes stress, worry, and overthinking. To prevent this, teenagers need to take an active role in correcting the way they speak to themselves and one another, in order to drive positive thoughts and emotions.
This is the strongest way for teenagers to grow their ability to manage their emotions. When we’re in a negative state, or highly emotional about something, it’s generally because that’s all we’re focusing on. While there are times where complete focus on something is good, the ability to shift focus from something negative to positive is imperative in order for teenagers to be able to stop a negative spiral of thoughts and emotions and bounce back quickly through focusing on the positives, and being able to find silver linings.
Helping your teenager to learn to manage their emotions is an important skill to give them as they become their own individual, and unfortunately is not one that is really covered in schools. So for parents, finding alternative forms of education to support your teenagers growth is the best way to give them a positive mindset to help them achieve success.